Tonight, I tripped so hard....

Every time I do Mazatapec mushrooms I feel like it’s an eye opener. I just realize so much. And it makes so happy. I remembered that money isn’t everything. Yes, it is a stress but there is so much more. I love my boyfriend, Mike, with my everything. He is my rock and he owns my heart. I will eventually marry this man. He makes me so happy. We do have fights. Our disagreements. Yes, of course. We have been together a fairly long time. But through the bad there is always 0.’;./.(I am puppy sitting and an eight week old lab came around around my laptop) that great shining happiness. At the end of the night I go to sleep with a man that loves me. And that is one of life’s greatest gifts.

But I also realize how much I love my best friend, Sami. We have been best friends for years. I have known this girl since the 1st grade. I’m 23 now. She literally knows my entire life. And we just get each other. I would give my life to save hers.
I love everything. My parents were wonderful. They gave my everything they could. And they taught me how to work hard for what I wanted. I wouldn’t trade them for the world. I consider my mom to be one of my best friends. She gave me life, but she saved me so many times in the past when I just didn’t think I could keep going. I would give the world to these people if I could. I want them to be happy. One day I will be able to help them (financially).

One another note, my two golden retrievers are the best two dogs in the world. We grew together. I feel like they helped me survive the teenager years. I couldn’t ask God for a better animal. Brook and Jake are my family. It’s honestly one of the best feelings knowing an animal loves you with their entire being. To be able to just hug them in total moments of devastation was like a life saver. I literally consider them to be a gift from God and I am not a very religious person. They are getting in their old age now. Turning white where there was once gold. And it’s a little heartbreaking. I would give part of my actual life in order for these two to stay with me. Losing them would kill a part of me. I feel like it would be another infliction to my heart. Adding another scar among so many others. But I will cherish my time with them. I just love them. Jake may be my favorite one. When I met him when he first came home I cried because I was just so happy. He was so cute. I never got to own a puppy. Sally came to us full grown. She was a wonderful dog too.

As tribute to my lovely animals, I will be getting tattoos for each dog I have owned. Sally, Jake and Brook. Some of the best beasts♥
So I am now coming off my trip. I had the craziest time. I don’t do Mazatapec Shrooms very often. I would say like once a year for the past 4 years. I feel like everytime I do them they open my eyes. I see the world for what it is. Some days I will forget this but it’s nice to have the reminder. It will get better. No worries. Be happy.
So my first shroom trip was really nice!
Four of us took 2 grams and the other two took 3.5 grams. Compared to my previous trips from acid it was very very light. Not much visual or audio distortion. But it was really nice! It was a lot shorter which I liked, it was so much more happy.

I feel like acid really makes you look within yourself and question your existence and reality, cosmos, and all those types of things, and shrooms is more of like a physical feeling of bliss and connectedness with everything. It’s like acid is an intellectual drug and shrooms are an emotional drug. But, to be fair it was a decently light trip so I’m sure on a heavier trip from shrooms it would be a lot more intense and similar to acid.
But I’m pretty glad I had a light trip yesterday. I was not ready for a full-blown two day trip like my other trips. The duration was a lot more do-able.
Next time I do shrooms though I think I’ll do at least an eighth, probably more. I think I prefer acid more, just for the fact that I’m more of a left-brain person and acid is more of a left-brain drug, compared to shrooms which I feel is more right-brained.
We also painted and made tons and tons of art and it all looks so beautiful!

shrooms yesterday was so much funa!!
we went on the greatest hike on this amazing cliff/mountain on the beach (Torrey Pines). everything was so beautiful and you could see patterns everywhere and oh my god the colors! we tried to wrap our minds around the fact that the entire mountain was once submerged in water; around the ancient limestone layers in the rainwater-eroded cliffside. and we had these great philosophical conversations and couldn’t stop laughing at everything and anything. fractal geometry! language and its culture! the possibilities of water! civilization and its discontent! the morality of diamonds! the corruption of modern food! we spent like 3 hours there just walking and looking at the ocean and getting lost in nature and our universe.

then i drove us to Urban Plates and we had a delicious meal of organic greens and saw the most beautiful southern californian sunset ever as we shared a chocolate cookie. and we thought about how enormous the swirling purple sky and the red-orange clouds really where, and how many cities they spanned, and how people in Laguna Beach were seeing the same sunset as we were at that very moment
then i met up with some other friends, rolled some spliffs and smoked them on this sandy white hill overlooking the ocean and a canyon full of city lights, then listened to the best music in the car as we drove around aimlessly, the beat rattling the seats and down to our bones; in sync with the bumpy road and our fragmented thoughts
then i met up with a different friend and we smoked some moles and i got too high to carry a conversation with him (was it awkward? I couldn’t even tell). he told a story and I tried my hardest to follow it, then after an eternity of silence (or was it ten minutes) we called it a night and I went to bed and slept fantastically

it was a great day!!